The Little Girl Who Lives Down The Lane (1976)

 

This is a film I'd never heard of until I stumbled across a You tube channel recommending 70's horror flicks you need to see but, might never of heard of. Now this isn't horror, in the horror "sense", but real life horror. A young girl lives with her Father, but her secretive nature catches the attention of the conservative neighbours. First things first, Jody Foster is just 13 years old in this movie and her performance is nothing less than astonishing. I remember  seeing her in 'Paper Moon' with another incredible performance, but this is almost another level. The whole supporting cast are top level, but a special mention to  Martin Sheen who is just awesome, the most seedy MF borderline pedo you can imagine. The final scene of Jody's character as Ryan will burn into your soul as she stares at the camera with no emotion which seems to never end, so much so, I had to turn it off. A masterpiece of film making.

4.5/5

High Tension (AKA Switchblade Romance) (2003)

Strap your selves in for this French( yes I said French!) high octane, stalk and slash flick which never skimps on the blood, by the end of the film what's remaining of the cast resemble those mad Spaniards who partake in that annual tomato throwing event! The plot is your average horror flick, young women stalked by homicidal maniac, but the film is classily shot, creepy, scary and as pointed out lovely and gory with throats and limbs slashed and a tasty decapitate. (always a plus point in any movie!)The film has a pretty smart twist at the end which I thought worked, though the popcorn crowd seem to treat it with disdain as it involves some thought.

This was one of Director Alexandre Aja's first movies and he went on to make some cool genre movies, 'Crawl', 'Horns', the 'Hills Have Eyes' entertaining remake and of course the ultimate in exploitation comedy horror ', who can forget, Piranha 3-D' !!!!

4.5/5

Grotesque (2009)

 An unnamed Doctor kidnaps a young couple and tortures them both physically and sexually for his own twisted pleasure, there, that's the plot, well, what else is there to say?

Well for starters this sicko Japanese torture porn flick makes one of the Saw or Hostile films look very tame, eye gouging, disembowelment, genital mutilation, amputation by chainsaw, this is serious hardcore horror only for those with the strongest stomachs and is quite unrelenting.
After release  the film was deemed so sadistic that is was point blank refused a certificate by the BBFC stating "given the unacceptable content featured throughout cutting the work is not a viable option in this case and the work is therefore refused a classification" Fast forward to 2026 and it's readily available uncut on blu-ray!

Sick and twisted it is still a well directed film with a suitable grim ending, approach with caution folks!

3.5/5

Bad Milo (2013)

 An everyday tale of an office worker Duncan (Ken Marino) who lives with a demonic creature up his rear end which reeks vengeance on those who have angered him....

Firmly with it's tongue in it's (ass) cheek, 'Bad Milo' comes from the same stable as 'legendary' 80's shlock horror monster movies such as 'Terrorvision'. 'The Deadly Spawn' and of course Frank Henenlotter's classic 'Basketcase'.
The plot is pure madness, the monster, cheap, runner and ridiculous, the blood is spayed in bucket loads, and the film finishes with the towns folk hunting down the monster whilst carrying burning torches (ala Karloff's Frankenstein)
Utter rubbish, loved it.

4/5

**COMING SOON** Ice Cream Man (2026) 1st Teaser Trailer!

 This one I've been really looking forward to since it was announced, the premise? A Town descends into madness when an Ice Cream Man serves "sweet delights" with horrifying results.... What really wet my whistle is the fact that it's directed by Eli Roth, who brought us the brilliant 'Eli Roth's History Of Horror' a few years ago, an essential documentary series for fans of the genre, but of course he's also brought us such delights as the 'Cabin Fever' movies, as well as 'Hostel', 'The Green Inferno', the under-rated 'Death Wish' remake from 2018 and more recently the awesome slasher 'Thanksgiving'. I'm Sold!

UK release date is penned in for 29/10/26 Halloween!!!

Traumatika (2024)

A young boy's nightmares become reality when his parents show signs of a demonic possession.

This has got some good reviews, some saying it's one of the most disturbing films in recent years, so my hopes were high, yes it's good, but...In all fairness it's nothing I haven't seen before. It's well made, well shot, creepy, the 'demon' when it briefly appears is pretty awesome, but I was never that gripped, I can't really explain why. It's at times brutal and quite nasty with quite a cool, unexpected finale, with the killer wearing an early Jason style mask (and baseball cap to boot!) so, worth a watch, but a one watch movie for sure.

3.5/5

Ready Or Not 2: Here I Come (2026)

 

Following on from the original, moments after surviving an all out attack from the unhinged De Nomas family, Grace (the excellent Samara Weaving) discovers she has to survive the next level of the nightmarish game, this time with the help of her estranged Sister Faith (Kathryn Newton) so how does this sequel compare to the cult classic original? Oh boy it does. The violence kicks off almost immediately, the movie is an orgy of comic book kills, talk about a blood soaked 110 minutes, it barely pauses for breath. Weaving and Newton are fabulous, constantly bitching at each other, the black comedy tones just ramp up the entertainment throughout. Critics said it was a bit of a cash in on the success of the first movie, rubbish, this more than holds it own, and to finish the film on one of many highs, we the appearance of a cute Goat!

4.5/5

**COMING SOON** Faces Of Death (2026)

 

Now when this was announced late last year it really was a what the f**k moment, why would you make a film about a notorious video nasty documentary from the late 70's? The film was just a collection of real life murder/death scenes, stuff all more readily available with the internet, so what are earth would this be for? Well early reviews are hugely positive, it's a total reimagining of the original, this time a woman is a video content moderator and believes that some murder scenes she is viewing are real and have been influenced by the original seedy documentary. Looking at  'Rotten Tomatoes'  it's getting a very healthy 69%, "an impressively nasty piece of work", "a halfway clever retro slasher", "the most smartest horror movie of the year so far", are just some of the good reviews, and it also bolsters a very healthy 68% from the general public, bring it on!!

*sadly no release date penciled in for the UK at this moment in time, so I'll be, ahem, "looking else where" cough*

Thrash (2026) Netflix

 

I "pre-reviewed" this about a month ago, but with some hope, the director, Tommy Wirkola, was responsible for the quality 'Violent Night' and 'Dead Snow', but with some trepidation, it's made by Netflix. The plot is an absolute rip off of the awesome Alligator flick 'Bait' a few years back, a violent storm rips through a small town where upon an Alligator goes on a killing spree, well this is the same premise but with sharks, and oh dear, the result is grade B movie making. A slow turgid first hour, the CGI for the storm in all fairness is very, very good, but the shark effects at times are pretty embarrassing, the acting poor, characters really quite annoying, especially the pregnant woman who you  just hope gets munched to shut her up. The final third things do pick up a little, but by then I'd gone past caring, it does include the un-intentional hilarious line when someone exclaims "we need something that runs on batteries....and vibrates!!!" though!

2/5

Dredd (2012)

 Now I've never been a huge fan of 2000 AD but Judge Dredd....well what a creation, Cop...Judge and Jury..Executioner!

Back in the 90's Sly Stallone was cast in the first ever celluloid outing of this classic comic book character, the reviews were terrible, I refused to watch it on principle, and still have to this day, he shows his face for fucks sake...sacrilege. But, 17 years later (17 years!!) we finally got what we have been waiting for, Dredd (the superb Karl Urban) is a Human 'RoboCop' dishing out Justice and  punishment, helmet firmly planted on his head, gun blasting bad guys head, cheek bones and limbs off, top notch ultra violence!

His Rookie side kick Anderson (Olivia Firlby) is faultless, a solid no nonsense character who adds so much to Dredds almost robotic, expressionless Policing, adding some kind of humanity to the madness of Mega City 1.

A stark, bleak nihilistic adult, intelligent comic book film ( quite reminiscent of the classic 'District 9') with some top notch ultra violence, including the best scene involving 'we will kill you at any cost' one sided machine gun assault!!!!!

4.5/5

We Bury The Dead (2024)

 

Now I love a zombie apocalypse movie so this was on my radar straight way, slow burner, all out gore, comedy , any movie in the Zombie genre I'm up for it. This ones a post Zombie post apocalypse survival flick, Daisy Riley stars as Ava who is searching for her husband after a catastrophic accident involving a weapon of mass destruction, yes the US are accountable, Trump though has a few years or months to fulfill that dream, little bit of politics there! This is a slow burn thoughtful flick, very much in the vein of the last two '28 Years Later' movies, Daisy Ridley is excellent throughout, she's pretty much in every frame of the movie, the Zombies look great, gnarly, bloody, nasty, and when the violence erupts it doesn't hold back. Well worth a watch.

4/5

Jan-March 2026 stinkers!!!

 Well I've done my best of the first quarter so far, so without further ado, here's the stinkers. This time though I have included films not released this year or the latter part of 2025 as there was only a few new stinkers that stunk my front room out, so, enough of this flim flam, let's get to the list!

1. 'Grizzly Night' (2026) -you expect a Grizzly Bear causing chaos, nope, zilch.

2. 'London Boulevard' (2010)- what a waste of a great cast.

3. 'Raw Justice' (1994)- not even Pamela can save this dog turd.

4. 'The Dive' (2023)-Absolute dirge fest.

5. 'Dolly' (2026)- this film's getting some love, why? it's cheap pathetic film-making that thinks it's a homage to the 70's grindhouse "classics" such as 'The Hills Have Eyes' etc..

**MOVIES OF THE YEAR PART 1** Jan-March 2026

 

Well we're a third of the way into another new year, so here's my pick of the new movies so far in the past 12 weeks, some were released in the later part of of 2025, but I've included them as well, some I'm still to watch such as 'Ready Or Not 2' and 'You Will Die Tonight", but enough of this piffle, here's my Top 10 so far.

1. 'Send Help' (just a great gory giggle from the master Sam Raimi)

2. 'I Swear' (the feel good movie of any year)

3. 'Wasteman' (hugely ignored great Brit flick)

4. 'Primate' (mad monkey madness!)

5. 'Cold Storage' (old school monster comedy/horror)

6. 'Crime 101' (class thriller)

7. 'Hoppers' (back to their best Pixar release)

8. 'The Plague' (brutal coming of age drama)

9. 'Mike & Nick &Nick & Alice' (just a mad fun goofy movie)

10.'28 Years Later: The Bone Temple' ( the IRON MAIDEN moment!)

I Swear (2025)

 

Everything you have heard or read about this film is as you would hope. Based on the true story of Scottish teenager John Davidson's struggles with Tourette's Syndrome. Robert Aramayo is inspirational in his performance portraying determination, grit and quiet grace, whilst battling something he can't explain and people chastise him for. Yes you will laugh at, shall we say, "inopportune moments", but John's warm character just makes you root for the young man even more. It's a cliche, but it really is the feel good film of the year, culminating when John receives an MBE from The Queen in 2019

4.5/5

Springsteen: Deliver Me From Nowhere (2025)

 

'Deliver Me From Nowhere' chronicles Bruce Springsteen's struggles with depression and his insistence on releasing the "Nebraska" album, a stark bare bones acoustic album recorded on a four track in his bedroom. Jeremy Allen White is excellent as Springsteen, as is Jeremy Strong as his manager, the legendary Jon Landau. Throw in Stephen Graham as Bruce's father and you get quality throughout, this won't be for everyone, it is a slow watch, a man trying to cope with the past and mental issues that he can't erase, even though he has achieved huge success with the release of "The River". Probably a movie more for the Springsteen fan, but so well acted it's well worth a watch for the star quality on show.

4/5

Cannibal Holocaust (1980)

 

Inspired by the excellent dvd box set "Video Nasties:The Definitive Guide", I decided to 'dig out' one of the previously banned infamous nasties which had somehow passed me by.I'd seen Cannibal Ferox and Holocaust many years ago, Ferox lives up to it's infamous reputation, gory, grim but great 'fun', Holocaust on the other hand is also gory, incredibly grim, but also a very well made horror movie of it's time, you'll feel the need for a shower after watching this slice of Italian sleeze.

So how does 'Cannibal Apocalypse 'size up?

Well we have the usual ingredients of an Italian shlocker, crap American actors, truly dreadful acting, appalling dialogue, but sadly the gore count is surprisingly low and I'm struggling to see what offended the authorities so much with this flick, a few people get bitten, there are a couple of stand out gore moments but it must be said theses are few and far between and the film has been now readily to buy for some time now....though I wouldn't waste the time or money.

2/5

12/12/12/ (2012)

A woman gives birth, during the birth the baby kills the Surgeon and Nurse, then things get even sillier....

Quite simply this is without doubt one of the most hilariously awful films I have ever seen!!!

The 'acting', 'plot' and 'special effects' ( I use these terms very loosely) are not just B-movie but Z-movie, so atrocious are they.The whole film is littered with head scratching  plot holes you could fly a 747 through, for example:

• As I said the Surgeon and Nurse die during the birth of the baby, this doesn't seem to bother the mother Veronica (Sara Malakul Lane) as she lies there with her baby, next to Cops and two dead bodies!!
• The Police are called when the parents suspect there is an intruder in their property, a Detective (sucking a lolly pop) turns up literally 20 seconds later!!
• Veronica's husband kills himself by drinking boiling water, she doesn't seem too affected by this either....
• Why does the Detective whilst looking for the intruder pick up a dead rat by its tail, look at it, then put put it down again as if it was a suspect?!
• How has Veronica managed to get a super fit body only 6 days after giving birth?
• Why, when discovering a dead Police Officer outside her house, does Veronica not call 911 but leave the  Detective a voice mail message!?!?! (and why does he not turn up until later in the day?)

The dialogue is hilarious, my favourite being this exchange, Veronica's sister has just showered and is getting dressed, evil baby is 'watching'

Sister-"VERONICA GODDAMIT! Your Baby is a pervert!!"

Veronica-"What??"

Sister-"I was changing and it was watching me!!"

 

The ending is the icing on the turd flavoured cake, the evil baby show his ugly mug, he really does have a face only it's Mother could love...mental!!

 

So are there any plus points?

Well yes.

For starters 'actress' Sara Malakul Lane is super hot, so us guys have some eye candy, but, yes the film is beyond bad, but, it obeys the rules of bad (horror) movies, its truly dreadful. but  most importantly, it's  entertaining for all the wrong reasons and never dull or boring!

1/5 for the movie

4/5 for entertainment value!

Frankenstein's Army (2013)

You just can't go wrong with Zombie Nazi's!

 Russian soldiers are pushing into East Germany during WW2, all they find are a few dead Nazi's, and the twisted remains off what seems to be half Human, half machine 'soldiers', soon though they stumble upon something more terrifying than the Third Reich!

If you've seen the mad trailer  for this movie you'll know what to expect, you're also be pleasantly surprised. For a low budget horror flick by a first time director, Frankensteins' Army has very high production values, good solid acting, great sound FX, good set designs, and the monsters look great!
Each creature is original, like a mash of Nazi Cenobites from the mind of HR Geiger and Guillermo Tel Torro, drills, knives or guns for hands, real nightmare stuff. The found footage POV works a treat, adding to the films sense of chaos, terror and dread, like a viewing a 1st person shoot 'em up on a high end console. and who can not dislike a movie that features a human robot that resembles the love child of Dusty Bin, R2D2 and a seriously twisted mind!

4/5

Mission To Lars (2013)

 

Tom Spice has Fragile X Syndrome, a kind of autism and the most common form of an inherited learning disability, he is also a massive fan of Metallica, and drummer Lars Ulrich in particular, his brother and sister Will and Kate make it their promise to get Tom to meet his hero and they set off on a trip to the US hitting the Metallica tour, ringing promoters, journalists, anyone to get a one on one with Will and Lars.
A thoroughly heart warming documentary, it won't tell you much about Toms condition, but it will tell you everything about a loving family's bond and what they will do for each other, it's a rollercoaster ride with plenty of ups and downs but ultimately an uplifting finale that you hope for, and an experience that not just fulfilled Toms dream, but also acted as a 'medicine' to his condition giving him new confidence from his adventure.

4/5

**COMING SOON** Deep Water (2026)

 

SHARKS!!

Yes, it's more than likely it will be a cheese fest, it's directed by Renny Harlin who has made the recent appalling 'Strangers' trilogy, and his last decent films were 'Mindhunters' and 'Deep Blue Sea' twenty plus years ago. It does star Ben Kingsley and Aaron Eckhart so we can live in hope and hopefully, just hopefully, for some good nasty Shark action.

At Close Range (1986)

 

I can't say I'd even heard of this movie until just recently, but when I saw the cast it was 80's Heaven (what a time to be alive) Christopher Walken, Sean Penn and his brother Chris (rest in peace), Kiefer Sutherland, Mary Stuart Masterson, this took me back those times. Penn and Walken are superb throughout, especially Walken who must be regarded as one of the greatest actors of our generation, he oozes menace in every scene. It's a slow burner, utterly bleak, a young Man drawn into a hideous dangerous violent world of crime to make some money, and make a new start with the love of his life. Just quality film making from start to finish.

4.5/5

Dolly (2026)

 

I really don't even know where to start with this. Now I love a low budget slasher, and this is one I was looking forward to, what a letdown. Zero storyline whatsoever, so back story, just some cumbersome nobody in a porcelain mask chasing after two people for 80 minutes. Now when I say "chasing", she (it?) sticks a shovel through Stifler's lower jaw and leg (sorry Seann William Scott, yes him!) he crawls around the woods for the rest of the movie occasionally screaming (how? his jaw is in two pieces!) and his girlfriend runs around, falls over after one minute when first per sued, says "Hello?" at every occasion giving us a full house in the horror movie cliche bingo card. The gore is kept to a minimum, the only slight redeeming moment in this disaster is when Mommy force feeds our fleeing damsel in distress some special milk, which she doesn't appreciate to say the least! What a stinker.

1.5/5

**COMING UP THIS MONTH**

'I Know Exactly How You Die' 7/4

'Faces Of Death' 10/4

'The Whistler' 10/4

'Hunting Mathew Nichols' 10/4

'The Yeti' 10/4

'Lee Cronin's The Mummy' 17/4 (my least favourite "Monster")

'The Serpent's Skin' 24/4

'Exit 8' 23/4

'Hokum' 30/4

More details HERE on the excellent "Spooky Astronauts" You Tube channel.

Movies Of The Month March 2026

 Again, only first watch movies, so without further ado, my best of from the past month.

1. 'Power: The Rise And Fall Of Huw Edwards' - I didn't think for a moment a Channel 5 drama with Martin Clunes as Edwards would be so good, but this is a quality production from the company, full thought's here.

2.Hoppers-Just a delight and classic Pixar.

3.'Cold Storage'- Such a great laugh, a full on tongue in cheek creature feature with some great digital and practical effects.

4.'Mike & Nick & Nick & Alice' -an absolute blast of an action comedy.

5. 'Murder In The Front Row' -great music documentary on the Bay Area Metal scene available on Prime.

Hoppers (2026)

 

Pixar have created some of the best movies for Children and adults imaginable in the past 30, yes, 30 years. The 'Toy Story' saga (we'll ignore the final effort and a blot on the perfect three entries) , 'Monster Inc', 'Up', 'Inside Out' etc and this can be added to those classics. The movie just looks beautiful, stunning animation, great characters and a movie with so much heart highlighting the contempt big business has towards the environment and nature "this by-pass will save 4 minutes in travel time"

4.5/5

London Boulevard (2010)

 

With a stellar British cast including Colin Farrell, Keira Knightley, Ray Winston, Anna Friel, David Thewliss, Sanjeev Bhaskar, Eddie Marson and Stephen Graham, my hopes for this were huge, but what a letdown! The film has a total lack of momentum, it just never gets into second gear, not one single scene last's for more than minutes. The plot is dull, the huge talent on display is wasted, Winstone try his best as a bad ass boss, Thewliss just a typical role of his, "posh" druggy annoying waster, utterly dull throughout and a total stinker!

1.5/5

Power: The Downfall of Huw Edwards (2026)

 

I didn't think for a moment a Channel 5 drama with Martin Clunes as Edwards would be so good, but this is a quality production from the company. Martin Clunes is quite superb as the vile Edwards, a skin crawling, powerful, deeply unsettling performance as the manipulative Edwards. Some critics have said this was released "too soon" (what to gloss over what is now known?) and it was "exploitative", exploiting who, the vile Edwards? How this retched man wasn't given prison time is beyond me, power and fame again "saving" him from time in the nonce wing and utter justice.

4.5/5

** COMING SOON** Thrash (2026) (Netflix)

 

Now 'Crawl' from a few years ago was a belter of a horror flick, and this is so similar it plot, it's a bit cheeky. A violent hurricane rips through a coastal town bringing destruction and chaos, but things get really bad when it brings something worse...a bunch of hungry Sharks!

Now I LOVE a Shark movie so this caught my attention straight away, the "bad news" is that it's a straight to Netflix release, but the really good news is it's directed by the guy who bought us the mad 'Dead Snow' and the Christmas cracker from a few years ago 'Violent Night'.

It's out on release on April 10th.

Mike & Nick & Nick & Alice (2026)

 

With such a strange title, this is one movie that  probably won't draw your attention but it's well worth looking out for. Two gangsters and the woman they love try to avenge a murder, with the help of a time machine! This is so quirky, not a spoiler but you get two Vince Vaughn's for the price of one, and Vince is in top form throughout, oh and the bonus of Aiza Gonzalez. Quirky, really violent, a great mix of violence (the finale is a bloodbath) loads of dark humour and great one liners, a banging soundtrack (Oasis, Andrew WK, Chemical Brothers etc) great fun from start to finish and a cool little twist to finish it off.

" I don't hate all Rats, I like that one that could cook"

"..you mean the one in Ratatouille?"

4.5/5

Scream 7 (2026)

 

I have to admit as I've previously said I'm not a big fan of this franchise, the original release of course was a classic and a game changer in the horror genre, and contained one of the greatest shock twist intro's to a movie ever, but since then they have been utterly forgetable ever since and this is no exception. Yes it starts off really good, a cool lead up to a nice gory kill and then it settles into it's usual bland routine. Annoying characters, dodgy over the top Police officers (where are they when things kick off?) why does ghost face wear that mask when he's hell bent on killing, the only reason is for the lame "reveal" at the end. The kills are quite weak, again, it just goes through the motions of the previous films, just so "by the numbers" and more of the same old same old.

2/5

Match Point (2006)

 Its Woody Allen's wonderful world of upper class Blighty!

An Irish (really??) ex tennis pro Chris (Johnathan Rhys Meyer) who never quite made it is hired by a London club to coach toffs, he soon falls for one a sister of a toff, marry'

Any excuse....

s into her rich family, Daddy loves him and gives him a job, everything is hunky dory, or is it?

Things start to fall apart when he falls for Nola (Scarlett Johansson ♥) the fiancé of his brother in law, when she is dumped he starts a steamy affair....
Plus points are a fairly good slow burning fluffy plot, good British cast (loads of faces from UK tv including a hilarious cameo from Paul Kaye aka Denis The Penis as as an estate agent!) and of course Scarlett is drop dead gorgeous. Trouble is though its a stereotypical Americans depiction of Britain, all champagne, caviar, cocktails and a stiff upper lip.Its all slightly Downton Abbey in the 21st Century, and things take a bizarre twist, when Chris turns into an assassin, thankfully he outwits Scotland Yards very own Keystone Cops!

Silly, but enjoyable fluff.

3.5/5

The Dyatlov Pass Incident (aka Devils Pass) (2013)

 

Based on true events, in 1959, nine experienced climbers were found frozen to death in the Ural mountains of Northern Russia, 50 years later a group of US students retrace their steps in a hope to find out what really happened.

Directed by Renny Harlin (Die Hard 2, Cliffhanger) 'The Dyatlov Pass Incident' really doesn't have one ounce of originality, it's basically 'The Blair Witch Project' on ice, later stealing the visuals and horror from the first [REC] movie, but it does it well. Slow burning, gripping, some good visuals, none too annoying cast, though the odd dodgy bit of dialogue does creep in:

"It's like a giant worm hole...a transporter"
How did it get here?"
"I don't know"

Things all go a bit X Files in the final 20 minutes and it's topped off with a rather clever 'twist' finale, well worth a look, though Gemma Atkinson's never worn so many clothes!! (Boo!)

3.5/5

**COMING SOON** They Will Kill You (2026)

 

Yet another must see movie for 2026, I really am getting spoilt this year! This bad boy is released at the end of this month, and 'Bloody Disgusting' have just gave it a rave review. A young Woman has to survive a night in a demonic cults mysterious death trap of a lair, promising "epic kills" and "dark humour" I'M IN!

Murder In The Front Row-The San Francisco Bay Area Thrash Metal Story (2019)

 

I've had this documentary on my Prime to watch list for some time, but largely ignored it as I thought it would be some budget production, boy was I wrong. Brilliantly produced with huge names from the 80's thrash world, everyone's here, Metallica, Anthrax, Megadeth, Slayer (the so called big four, still melting ears all these years later) and loads of the "lesser" bands such as Exodus, Testament, Possessed etc. Hugely entertaining and informative, what a time to be alive in the US, the thrash of the Bay Area and the Glam of LA which I both equally embraced, I could never understand why some rock fans felt you could only embrace one genre, and in the words of Billy Joel..."It's still rock 'n roll to me"

4/5

A Gangsters Life (2026)

 This has to be seen to be believed! (ignore that, please)

Now, I love a Brit flick facking gangstar movie, usually absolute garbage but great fun, this....... is absolute gabage, and when I say that, I really, really, mean it, quite possibly one of the worst movie experience's in some time. Two bloke's ( Ant and Dick-I kid you not) rip off a gangster, flee to Greece, gangstar turns up to kill them,  that's it. The pacing (?) of the film is beyond slow, reverse gear, downhill in a snow plough, how can I describe it? It's like watching the worst soap opera ever x2. One "scene" involves a TV not working, the geezer tells his girlfriend .....she tells him it always does this, there's a "box" outside that will fix it (something might happen I'm thinking) no, he resets the box, goes back to the bedroom, his girlfriends now asleep.........THAT'S IT!! Any violence is off screen, the amount of inane dialogue is off the scale, I'm writing this with another 30 minutes running time, the things I do for my movie blog !

"Dick I need you.....NOW DICK!"

Final word, just loved it when the assassin turns up, gets invited to a party of five or six, ends up having a poolside meal with them...but NO ONE blinks an eye-lid !!!!!!!!! (update-the film has ended, yes indeed, it is utter s***e)

0/5 YES ZERO!

Ray Harryhausen: Special Effects Titan (2012)

 For a fan of the movies Ray Harryhausen is a legend, after watching "King Kong" as a child he fell in love with the idea of 'stop motion' and the ability to create creatures from your imagination, fable or folklore and bring them to life! This is exactly what Ray did for three decades, and this wonderful documentary tells that story. "Jason And The Argonauts", "The 7th Voyage Of Sinbad", "Clash Of The Titans", "Valley Of Gwangi", these were the movies I grew up watching on the TV and in the cinema, and they are the films that inspired a host of film legends, Tim Burton, Peter Jackson, Steven Spielberg, James Cameron, our very own Nick Park, saw the amazing creatures that Ray brought to the screens and were inspired by his creative visions of wonderful alien worlds and creatures taking on mankind!

Director, model maker, artist, visionary, all round nice guy.

Legend.

5/5

(originally posted on my previous movie blog  "Drunken Movie Ramblings"

Bodycam (2026)

 

Two Police Officers investigate a domestic dispute, when they get there things soon go pair shaped with a shooting they try and cover up, only to discover they are being watched....Yes it's another first person cam caught on camera film and for the most part it delivers, it's well creepy, but by the final third of it's trim running time it seems to run out of steam. Don't get me wrong, it's a good film like I said, but that finale it seems to lose it's way and what must be said some slightly dodgy CGI. Worth a watch, but let down by that final 15 minutes or so.

3/5/

Available on Shudder now 

Grabbers (2012)

 Aliens invade an Island in um...Ireland, the only way to survive is get drunk...book me a flight!!!

I had slightly low expectations, hopefully mildly amused at best, but how wrong was I.
Utterly engaging characters, dry, witty dialogue, a real fun B-Movie horror flick so reminiscent of such classics as Tremors and Deep Rising, with even a knowing nod to the drunken exploits of Gremlins towards the end.

Great Balti & a Beer Saturday night (or any night) entertainment.

4/5 

(previously reviewed on my old movie blog "Drunken Movie Ramblings")

Landman Series 1 (2024)

 

That's series, not 'season', I hate that Yank "title".

I've only just got into this late, but boy was it worth it. The series on paper doesn't jump out at you on paper, the story is set within the Oil Fields of West Texas involving the billionaire owners, the every day roughnecks...oh and  the "Gallino" drug cartel  causing no end of problems. 10 episodes of pure class with a steller cast, Billy Bob Thornton is the star of the show as Tommy Norris the operations manager, but he is backed up by Demi Moore, John Hamm, Ali Larter, Kayla Wallace (pure beauty and a beast as their Lawyer) and a host of other great performances. The final episode is a feature length episode and left me dribbling for the second series, bring it on!!

5/5

Death Race 3:Inferno (2013)

This is one movie with what you get is on the tin!!

Ving Rhames IS Ving Rhames...mean and moody. Danny Trejo is Danny Trejo, mean, moody, and umm...Mexican .Luke Goss is Jason Statham, sorry, "Frankenstein", mean, moody and troubled.

We get the usual cliched supporting characters, the geek guy with a constant furrowed brow, the scumbag Brit Billionaire(Dougray Scott)  and his scintillating dialogue "NO WAY, NO FUCKING WAY!", This is just fucking awesome" etc..oh and some of the most sexist female characters you will ever encounter, the run down secretary becomes a high flying exec...how does she prove this? Takes her blonde locks out of a bun, puts on a short skirt and shows off her heaving bosom, as for bosoms, give Tanit Phoenix, as Frankenstein's girlfriend, an award for best 'supporting role', or should that be her bra, for keeping her cleavage in check for 100 minutes!!!
Pounding rock score, explosions, machine guns, cleavage, muscles, grimacing, cheap ass "Mad Max 2" car chases, enjoyable nonsense.

3.5/5

(from my previous movie blog "Drunken Movie Ramblings")

Red, White And Blue (2010)

An emotionless  young woman Erica (Amanda Fuller) sleeps around knowing she has HIV, a form of revenge for her dark early years, she gets a job in a DIY store, and meets a man who is kind to her, and not 'expecting anything' in return, something alien to her in the past. This is a tough, hard going drama, 30 minutes in I wasn't sure I could continue, grim, despair, very little dialogue, but stick with it, as the movie's finale is like a baseball bat to the back of the head, and something you won't forget for a long time so hardcore are the scenes of revenge. Hard hitting, brutal film making.

4/5

(from my previous movie blog "Drunken Movie Ramblings"

Mama (2013)

A couple adopt their two niece's after they have disappeared for 5 year's, only to be discovered fending for themselves in a remote cabin severely traumatised and displaying animal like tendencies, these though are far from the only problems they bring with them, as a ghost like presence seems to be "protecting" them....

A good old fashioned ghost story, "Mama" has plenty of spooky, eerie moments with some very creepy visuals.The movie manages to avoid too many of the usual 'things that go bump in the night' cliches, Jessica Chastain is excellent as the "Step Mother" Annabel (you won't believe its the same actress in "Mollys Game"!)

The movie does play better when the ghost is hiding in the shadows, we get the all out CGI confrontation in the finale, but this doesn't detract from what a fine rather creepy horror movie "Mama" turns out to be.

4/5

(from my previous movie blog "Drunken Movie Ramblings")

Stiches (2012)

 

A Clown (Ross Noble) comes back from the dead to reek vengeance on those he blames for his accidental death at a children's Birthday, party many years ago.

Kind of "Friday 13th" meets Freddy Krueger with a mass dose of 60's gore legend Hershell Gordon Lewis, 'Stitches' is purely played for (blood drenched) laughs. Ross Noble is perfect in the lead, he pretty much looks like a mad clown even without the makeup and red nose, some of the 'death scenes' are pretty inventive, especially two involving an umbrella and a bicycle pump!!

"THERE'S A KILLER CLOWN IN THE HOUSE!!"

Not in the slightest bit scary, but great, gory fun, and a very entertaining black comedy.

4/5

(from my previous movie blog "Drunken Movie Ramblings)

The Den (2013)

 

A young Woman (the rather lovely Melanie Papalia) studies the habits of web cam users (brave to say the least) but her life spirals out of control after witnessing a brutal murder. The whole web cam horror set up is quite popular ( 'The Host' from 2020 covid time is a must watch) so when this one popped up on a recommended disturbing movies to watch list I was intrigued. With a slim similar running time of just 75 odd minutes  (why can't movies just stick t the sub 90min running time?, similar to the aforementioned 'The Host', this doesn't go for the supernatural terror but real life serial killer aspect, and it does it well. The mix of web-cam and phone footage gives it a gritty , gnarly dirty feel, with the killer (s) disguised in 'Friday 13th-Part 2' early Jason look with the sinister (burlap) sack mask's. Well worth checking out.

4/5

Amy Madigan wins Oscar for best supporting actress in 'Weapons'

 

The first award for an actress in a horror from the Oscars for 35 years and thoroughly deserved, my movie of 2025, and one of the great, most creepy and scary performances ever!

And some more worthy winners below....

War Machine (2026)

 

It's a mad blend of 'Predator' and 'War Of The Worlds', the "invasion" isn't really explained but who cares. It's an hour and forty minutes and machine gun, bullets flying, soldiers getting fried and losing various limbs, lots of chest beating, concluding with some nauseating US flag waving that would give 'Independence Day' a run for it's money. Good fun, all in all.

3.5/5

Raw Justice (1994)

 

Pamela Anderson was the pin up of the 90's, and certainly mine in my mid-20's, so how on earth did this slip under my radar back then? Lets give it a go. So where do I start? Well the 'acting' and dialogue is appalling, there's cars blowing up for no reason, lots of shouting and grimacing, a quite ridiculous gratuitous sex scene (even for the 90's) , Pam and the knucklehead are being chased in broad daylight, fearing for their lives, end up getting jiggy in an alleyway, and suddenly it's all misty and it's the  evening 30 seconds later! Not even the "charms" of Pamela can make me recommend this garbage.

1.5/5

**COMING SOON** Over Your Dead Body (2026)

 

This upcoming release I'd never heard until a day or so ago when a youtuber Cody Leach gave it a massive thumbs up, and watching the trailer it does look a blast. A dysfunctional couple plan a weekend away to a secluded cabin (always a red flag) to repair their marriage, but soon realise they are both secretly plotting to kill the other! We've got a good solid cast, Samara Weaving, Jason Segal, Timothy Olyphant and the always mad Juliette Lewis who never fails to deliver. Due for release "sometime" this Summer, I still can't find a UK release date, this is one to keep an eye out for gore hounds.

Recommended Horror Documentaries

 

There are some belting Horror documentaries out there worth hunting down, here's a bunch I highly recommend.

* Crystal Lake Memories (2013) - the complete history of the Friday 13th franchise.

* RoboDoc-The Creation Of Robocop (2023) -fabulous 3 part series.

* Video Nasties: Moral Panic, Censorship and Moral Panic (2010) -the mad world of censorship in 80's UK.

* Adjust Your Tracking (2103) -the modern day US culture of Video collecting.

* Ban The Sadist Videos (2005) - Another great doc on the video nasties scandal of the 80's.

* Going To Pieces (2005) - the rise and fall of the slasher genre.

* His Name Was Jason: 30 Years of Friday13th. (2009)

* More Brains! A Return To the Living Dead (2011) a delightful doc on the wonderful 80's horror/comedy.

* Nightmares In Red White And Blue: The Evolution Of The American Horror Film (2009)

* Never Sleep Again: The Elm Street Legacy (2010)

* Physical Media Lives (2021) -nerds like me who love collecting!

* Stan Lee (2023) -affectionate tribute to the legend.

* The Making Of The Frighteners (1998)